Thursday Thirteen – 13 possibly unexpected things about being a bodyguard

Wow, I haven’t done this in a while, mainly as the Mister Linky code didn’t work on WordPress.com.  But it’s late, I’m sick with a cold, I can’t sleep and I have a Ronan Keating earworm from hell…so I have to do something!

So from one of my evil plot bunnies that won’t leave me alone:

Thirteen possibly unexpected things about being a bodyguard

1.  Never wear a polyester suit.  Or a black one, apparently.

2.  Always over compensate and wear a belt and braces.  All those useful little things need a home to clip to…and the braces keep your trousers up.

3.  Ignore the no black rule for shoes.  They must be lace ups and parade gloss shiny.

4.  No jewellery.  Nose rings are out.

5.  Make sure your trousers aren’t fighting with your ankles and don’t have a collar that strangles your neck.

6.  Bodyguards must not stink.

7.  Bad breath is also a big no-no.  Give garlic a 48 hour ban

8.  No smoking, nose picking or playing pocket billards.  This last one will not apply to my heroine.  Just saying.

9.  A bodyguard should never look bored.

10. Don’t flirt with others whilst on the job.

11. Don’t chew gum.  Or blow bubbles.

12. Never be late.

13.  And lastly, always, always remember you’re hired help. Erm, my heroine will forget this last golden rule…

All this useful information came from The Bodyguard’s Bible

 

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16 thoughts on “Thursday Thirteen – 13 possibly unexpected things about being a bodyguard

  1. An amusing list, and so glad I’m not the only person kept up by a cold last night. Though, once I did finally manage to fall asleep, I really slept. Hope you’re feeling better soon!

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